Family tiffs threaten longtime businesses in Brookline

A generational tug of war

It is an anachronistic town, fully equipped with a Board of Selectman rather than a mayor, turn of the century (20th, that is) architecture, and citizens who won't budge from their birthplace. And, of course, a plethora of family-owned "mom-and-pop" shops. So it's no surprise that many of the moms and pops of Brookline aren't comfortable relinquishing the reins to the younger generation.

"They want the business to stay in the family," says Brookline Village resident Anne Wallace, who holds a Ph.D. in organizational study and behavioral science from M.I.T. "But they want the kids to do business the way they did business, and they want them to take their advice and value their opinions."

While many of these establishments brandish new signs and decor, the older generation of Brookline business owners are loathe to admit that times are changing. In order to stay afloat they must open their minds and doors to changing professional practices, rather than simply making superficial adjustments.

"We are creatures of habit," Wallace says. "We all brush our teeth the same way every night. I try to teach people to brush a different way."

Working to save a community asset

Wallace has been a business consultant for more than 20 years, and in the past five years she has come into her specialty-family business. Her consulting focuses on change, and she helps clients find a way to accept and successfully implement any aberrations their businesses face.

"Independently owned stores are really valued by the community because they offer a greater variety of services than even the shops on Newbury Street or in Harvard Square," says Marge Amster of Brookline's Economic Development Office, a department of the town government that functions to keep Brookline's businesses thriving.

Nonetheless, there is little that the town's government can do, says Elias Audi, owner of three Brookline establishments-the Village and Harvard Street Mobile Stations, as well as the Cypress Car Lot-for the past 30 years. "I know from personal experience working with the Chamber of Commerce that the town is doing all that it can, but there is a historic distrust between the government and small business," he says.

The Economic Development Office mainly serves to put the town's entrepreneurs in touch with potential colleagues. From that perch it has a close perspective on the role different businesses play.

Says Amster, "Economic analysis reports show that mom-and-pop shops give back to the community at a much higher rate than chain stores."

Family feud

Even so, it is the "little guy" who often suffers, and that is what makes Wallace's job so vital to the town. At a time when the economy is poor and many businesses are closing their doors, particularly those of a small, privately owned variety, Wallace reports that many such businesses can be saved with the help of an impartial facilitator. Family squabbles are often enough to send borderline businesses over the edge, she says, forcing them to close their doors, just as outside help can often pull them back up and out of the red.

"It's a very common problem for family businesses," says Audi. "Family businesses are usually dominated by one person. It's hard to accept when a second, third or fourth come into it. It's hard to share power and ideas."

Wallace believes her services are needed when the dysfunctional family starts running a dysfunctional business, claiming that there is one paramount difference between family and corporate endeavors: Families must still sit across the table from one another at Thanksgiving dinner.

"You need to know where to draw the line in mixing family and business," says Audi, who shares both the blessings and burdens of family business with his wife and son. "You don't want to talk business at the dinner table and you don't want to bring personal problems to the shop."

And there is no rest for the weary. Those slaving over the family business cannot leave a grueling day of work and escape to the comforts of home-often, they share an abode with their business partners.

Typically, it is the children who seek the benefit of Wallace's expertise, while their parents disdain her presence-until she can prove her only interest lies in saving their collective livelihood; she must prove to the older generation that she isn't taking sides.

"A lot of people came to this country and couldn't get work because they didn't speak the language or because companies didn't want to hire immigrants, failing to remember that everyone here is an immigrant," she says, laughing.

A reluctance to change

These people did what they knew; they supported themselves and their families by honing a skill or exploiting a talent. Many people of their generation had no life outside of the business-they lived and breathed it, Wallace says.

Now reaching an age where they are considering retirement, the older generation faces a difficult transition. Having worked up to 80 hours a week, the fruits of their labor-or the lack thereof-become personal, and calling in an outsider to fix the problem is embarrassing to many.

"I am in a networking group-we mainly just refer clients to one another-and people seem to have the most trouble recommending me," Wallace says, pausing. "It's like recommending a shrink."

But she is careful to differentiate herself from a psychiatrist. While many in her field are very "touchy-feely" and concerned with the individuals' emotions, Wallace believes psychological welfare is secondary in her line of work.

"They don't bring me in so that everyone will feel good. They bring me in because something is interfering with their business," she says.

Sometimes the problems are simple, sometimes not. Called in to consult with a family business that included a father and four of his seven sons, Wallace realized that much of the trouble was the result of latent sibling rivalries-and she immediately went to work.

Her job was not to soothe old rifts, but rather to impart the necessary skills for them to bypass those rifts between the hours of 9 a.m. and 5 p.m. Wallace's first order of business was to teach the cluster of brothers to greet one another in the morning, opening the channels of communication necessary for successful business partnerships.

Sometimes, Wallace admits, her job is merely to point out the obvious. Unfortunately, many proprietors ignore their business's problems until it is too late.

"[Building a business] is just like raising kids-you don't want to see the bad, you only want to see the good," Audi says. [pullout quote]

'People aren't going to change overnight'

When the family ultimately requires outside assistance, they may have fallen so deeply into debt that they lack the funds necessary to bring in a consultant. But a lucky few come to terms with their problems while they can still afford the luxury.

So she teaches them the simple things: common courtesies, communication skills, and often, the hard learned lesson that the bottom line comes before tradition and personal attachments. In the end, emotions are only dealt with if they are impeding the business's ability to thrive.

"People think if they can't solve the problems themselves, there must be something wrong with them," Wallace says.

But nothing is necessarily wrong with these people-they may simply have a natural distaste for change. It's a fairly common problem, and one that Wallace relies upon to make her living.

She bases her fee on how long she expects to spend working with a particular family. This is typically many months; a year or more is not uncommon. While in some situations she feels it fit to charge between $300 and $500 per hour, she also works on set retainer for lengthier projects.

"People aren't going to change overnight," she says. They didn't get the way they are overnight and it's not going to go away overnight."